So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
