But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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