I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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