I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
