am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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