I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
