Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
