well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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