she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
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I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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