if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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