She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize