I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
where are my eyebrows?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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