I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
