Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Randomize
