I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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