Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc

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(201): whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc http://tfl.nu/bhl3

Replies (31) Good night (1677) Bad night (669)
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(806): View more from Texas

I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.

(512): View more from Texas

Did it?

(806): View more from Texas

Not as such, no.

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(806): I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes. (512): Did it? (806): Not as such, no. http://tfl.nu/c480

Replies (37) Good night (598) Bad night (4570)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?

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(508): There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun? http://tfl.nu/av48

Replies (17) Good night (4810) Bad night (1167)
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(410): View more from Maryland

We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.

(1-410): View more from Maryland

I hope you meant gum...

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(410): We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day. (1-410): I hope you meant gum... http://tfl.nu/fcg7

Replies (36) Good night (5067) Bad night (1059)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45

(773): View more from Illinois

Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy

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(814): i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45 (773): Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy http://tfl.nu/wt4o

Replies (7) Good night (3486) Bad night (957)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.

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(704): The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it. http://tfl.nu/e919

Replies (20) Good night (7859) Bad night (1154)
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(802): View more from Vermont

he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...

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(802): he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes... http://tfl.nu/9zzk

Replies (70) Good night (1236) Bad night (11290)
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(804): View more from Virginia

i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.

(804): View more from Virginia

i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.

(786): View more from Florida

that would mean it's on tape

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(804): i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately. (804): i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof. (786): that would mean it's on tape http://tfl.nu/zipf

Replies (6) Good night (3913) Bad night (936)
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(410): View more from Maryland

My mouth holds just enough water for my bong

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(410): My mouth holds just enough water for my bong http://tfl.nu/u9dn

Replies (7) Good night (2094) Bad night (1005)
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(248): View more from Michigan

We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.

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(248): We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer. http://tfl.nu/kn8l

Replies (8) Good night (3380) Bad night (1195)
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(630): View more from Illinois

I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.

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(630): I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode. http://tfl.nu/h8l8

Replies (11) Good night (3030) Bad night (686)
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(850): View more from Florida

I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.

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(850): I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong. http://tfl.nu/d58h

Replies (6) Good night (1355) Bad night (438)
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(240): View more from Maryland

Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.

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(240): Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum. http://tfl.nu/4chd

Replies (12) Good night (474) Bad night (927)
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(305): View more from Florida

I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"

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(305): I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me" http://tfl.nu/ic9y

Replies (0) Good night (475) Bad night (220)
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(256): View more from Alabama

this hospital has no fireball

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(256): this hospital has no fireball http://tfl.nu/h1f7

Replies (4) Good night (452) Bad night (253)

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