Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(406): View more from Montana

Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.

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(551): View more from New Jersey

And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.

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(516): View more from New York

This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.

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(818): View more from California

I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.

(818): View more from California

I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"

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(616): View more from Michigan

Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.

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