you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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