Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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