i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
