dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
