You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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