Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
