i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
where are my eyebrows?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
