no, he came in my armpit
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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