apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
