im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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