Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
