I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
True strength comes from lack of pants
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
