I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
