Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
