omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
