Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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