Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize