you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
