so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
