i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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