I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Randomize