I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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