toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize