Well douche your snatch and let's go!
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize