Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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