Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
