I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize