I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize