Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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