I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
