Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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