North Korea, Best Korea!
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
