i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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