um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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